Seeing the Suffering

I grew up blessed with early exposure to some hard truths about our world. One of the biggest was homelessness... and it’s something that has never left me and never will. But I still fail. And I did recently. How my heart has grieved. I have shed many tears and while I wish I could change my lack of action- God is using this opportunity to remember "the least of these".

Homelessness and drug and alcohol abuse often go hand in hand when people think of this group. While many certainly are fighting these demons- the truth is many need much more help than most communities provide. Many need people not just to point them in directions but to walk hand in hand with them and help.

Recently I went to BK to get a breakfast sandwich- I was feeling off and just needed some food. As I sat down a man approached me asking for money for a meal. It was cold outside. He had a swollen eye and looked rough. A worker came to shoo him away and sadly.... I let him. But the look he gave me was one of complete suffering and it has not left me. He was just------- so tired.

I ate a bit of the sandwich- but as the weight of what I had missed sank in- I felt sick to my stomach and the guilt came crashing down. I went out to look for him. He was gone. My chance was gone. I am still sick about this. I have wept so many tears.

I lost a moment to share the love of Christ! To share a meal with someone who was probably hungry and just needed a place to warm up. I have repented and prayed for the opportunity to come my way again. But if it doesn't I don't want this lesson to be wasted.

I am praying God uses this for His glory- and that in my complete failure something good can come from it. If nothing more it has renewed- what I learned long ago as a child.

I was nine when my mom interned at a church whose primary mission was helping the homeless and one of the things they did was serve a hot home cooked meal under the bridges of Denver every weekday- looking back I can see clearly how this was no small task!

My very first memory is pulling up and seeing a man lying on a torn, filthy mattress with no legs. I saw families with little kids- kids my age. And somehow, in the middle of all that hardship, these people loved us. And we loved them right back. I remember there being so many people that I felt completely overwhelmed at times. But those moments taught me what Scripture means when it says, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2).

When I was eleven, I got the chance to go back to Denver. That same trip, the church had expanded its efforts to feed homeless kids at night... including some very young girls not much older than I was, who were already being exploited through prostitution. It was heartbreaking. The conversations we had, the gut wrenching stories shared, the prayers prayed, and the little seeds we were planting made a huge life changing impact on me... and I truly hope it deeply impacted them to know that they were loved, wanted, valuable, and have a future because we serve a living God who is so so good... good enough to forgive me for ever forgetting these experiences...

That little church made a real difference in its community. “Let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth” (1 John 3:18).

When I was fourteen my mom became the director of a homeless shelter. I had even more exposure, and I got to see the real, tangible benefit of communities having places like that. Not everyone who came through was saved- many went back- but many did stay and work through the program! Watching people get back on their feet was nothing short of amazing. The shelter helped people get their documents, provided counseling and transportation, helped them find jobs, and eventually places of their own. Everything many communities today would greatly benefit from.

I watched people get sober. I saw families reunited. I saw life come back into people’s eyes- the kind of spark you don’t forget once you’ve seen it- hence my current heartbreak- had I only served would I have seen that light at the end instead of the look of despair? "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18).

As I write this I shed tears- I am reminded that we as Christians are called to Serve. Love. Show up. We will make a difference- even if we don’t realize how big it is at the time. Because “whatever you did for one of the least of these… you did for me” (Matthew 25:40).